Like daylight meets nighttime, it’s not on the map. You can only stay if you love someone here.
“Enough to give up everythin’ and stay with that one person. Which is how it should be. Cause after all, lad, if ye love someone deeply anythin’ is possible.” -Mr. Lundie, the Schoolmaster in the movie Brigadoon.
There is one thing about relationship a majority of the people miss altogether. It’s the “inbetween time,” about “us,” not the “you” on this side or “them” over there on the otherside. It’s the part in the middle.
The inbetween time is the line down the middle
A majority of people live their lives on one side of that line or the other. That line is the “inbetween time” called relationship. It’s a very fine line to walk. It’s a balancing act. A very fine balancing act of love and commitment. It is during those inbetween times when relationship is. The place that is nothing but potential. The edge is like the sharpest knife, it can be easy to fall off if you are not focused. The inbetween time is one where no-one, no-thing exists but two, it is where one person stops and another begins. How do you watch that moment? How do you live in it? That moment when the world changes.
The side of the ego
On either side of that line is the valley of the ego. There are no two ways about it. A person living from ego only knows “me,” my need and wants and they are valued at a high cost the detriment of relationship. The ego is very greedy and needy.
The line of relationship, the magical hour
It’s twilight time. The line of relationship is about everything that is selfless and accepting, and building a bridge. It’s a magical land that many people dream of spending time in. It’s a place that many people think they are actually spending time in, when they are not. It’s that time when you are left to connect the dots. This is exactly the spot where relationships fail and fall apart, because it is about faith. Time moves differently there. Take the risk of standing in the no-place, no-time. The time is nothing yet full of potential.
“Tra bod ben, bid bont!” If you would be a leader, build a bridge. –An old Welsh saying. A metaphor for bridging worlds.
Because it feels like a gap you need to fill in with something
Silly ego. It trusts no one or no thing. “If I can’t see it, feel it, touch it or taste it, then it must not be so, and therefore, I can’t believe in it. There are no spaces or gaps in life. I’m in control! And if there is a space in time then I must fill it in with something.” A thumb, a bottle, a pacifier.
How do you walk the line
Tricks are for rabbits. How do you make a relationship, “us,” an “one” when you are busy thinking it’s all about “me” or “them” over there? These people wear rose colored glasses, in that they look at relationships as tainted. They gossip, they make “fun” of others, they bully, their wall is up, they are “escape artists” always looking for an ‘exit.’ The ego has found its “us” and can’t see this is incorrect relationship. It is a self-serving relationship designed to “lock out” those “others,” pacify the ego and keep it out of harm’s way, the fear of getting hurt. No one is allowed in over the wall, and they don’t go out.
There are only two types of people
One who walks the inbetween time, and one who does not. There are loads of books on the shelves of book stores and libraries naming the many different types of men or women to avoid, or that would make indecent specimens to be in relationship with. There’s only one you need to know about.
You have to step out of ego’s comfort zone to see the magic of relationship happen. For it is not going to be all about you, or all about them. It is going to be about us. You have chosen to step into that inbetween time and space outside of all others to dwell in a time and space where a majority of the population only dream of being, you can tell this by the high divorce rate. Everybody wants to be in a relationship but nobody wants to let go of their ego and be committed to “us.”