Why we can’t seem to keep our New Year’s resolutions
Even though you may have failed each and every time you made a resolution. It could be that you were making goals that were impossible to reach.
The major reason for not being able to keep our resolutions
The biggest reason why we can’t keep our resolutions is that resolutions are often not well thought out. They are “spur of the moment ideas” that seem good at the time, but impossible to accomplish when you really analyze them.
How to effectively keep New Year’s Resolutions
Work on your resolutions to make them happen
- Just dreaming about a resolution or putting it off for another day is never going to get that resolution accomplished. You need to set goals for how you are going to accomplish your resolution and then do it.
- The reason most of us fail at keeping our New Year’s resolutions is that we set unrealistic goals. For example, if you are single and have no prospects in mind, setting out to get married before the end of the year is just not realistic. It is a nice dream. Take the time to really think about it. You haven’t found somebody and yet you think you can be married before the end of the year? Yes, it could be possible if you marry the first person you find, or is willing to marry you. Unfortunately many of these harried marriages end in divorce. It takes time to meet the right person and then it takes time to get to know that person before thinking about marriage.
Once you have decided upon your resolutions and you have your realistic goals in place you need an action plan. How are you going to successfully reach your goals? What do you need to do to make them happen? What do you need to change and what do you need to avoid in your life so that you can successfully complete your resolutions?
For example if is your goal is to get a better paying job what kind of job do you want and do you have the talent for it, if not then why not?
Do you need on the job training?
You need to familiarize yourself with the job requirements and make sure you get the training before pounding the pavement or sending out zillions of resumes.
Do you have to go back to school?
If so, what kind of school do you need to go? Do you need to go to a trade school, university, or high school for adult education?
What are the requirements to go to that school?
Sometimes people forget that they can’t just fill out the application and be accepted. Different schools have different criteria for acceptance. For example, some may require a physical examination due to the strenuous and physical curriculum. Some may require entrance exams, large tuition fees, professional references, previous courses or refresher courses, or prior experience in the field.
Do you need experience for the job you want and if so how will you get it?
After you figured out your plan of action and you know how you will get the tools you need to set you on the right track you must remain on the right track.
First, you must be persistent and continue to work towards your goal. You cannot stop midway and take a long break if you expect to get the goal accomplished in a timely manner.
However, some goals need not be set in a time frame such as if you want to better yourself as a human being. This goal takes a lifetime as each and every one of us can find new things to learn, and to change about ourselves.
Don’t give up
If you make a mistake and go off your diet or stop exercising, if these were your goals then get right back up and running again. Take one day at a time and make it a good one.
- Sometimes circumstances prevent us from reaching our goals. Perhaps you planned to go back to school and your spouse just lost his or her job. You may have to postpone your plans until your spouse finds a job or you may have get a job yourself. You might even consider taking online classes to ease the burden. Once things go back to normal resume your original plans or stick with the revision; whichever works best for you.
- Even when we set our goals and have planned carefully we may need to revise. For example, if your New Year’s resolution was to be more assertive and not the shy butterfly you have always been and now people are saying you are coming on too strong, you may need to tone it down.
The Key to completion of successful New Year’s resolutions
Set goals that are attainable, remember that small steps in the right direction are better than large plans that fall through.
The ideas presented here come from my experience and training as a counselor.