There was a movie called The Stepford Wives all about a small town in which the wives were…well perfect. Of course it was a fictional story, but it made a lot of men think about what they would define as the perfect woman. What about you women? Didn’t you see that same movie and wonder about what you’d like in the perfect man? For just a moment lets think about what women want without screaming “winey bitch” or using all the political correctness to define the perfect man – the Stepford Husband.
Let’s start with handsome and in each beholder’s eye that may be different but let’s say you’d all like your dream guy.
Besides the celestial visage you all dream about, you’d like an amazing body. That means Ken-like for most gals’ taste, but again in the eyes of the beholder you really want that perfect body.
Well hung is important for when your vibrator batteries die out or when you need an extra towel bar while putting on makeup.
Next you would like your guys to perform great back rubs and body scrubs. This is not asking too much, after all, we are defining the perfect man so let’s go all out. Being able to do the mani-pedi thing is a bonus for when we don’t have the hours needed to do same at the salon where we can catch up on gossip. It may sound odd, but in lieu of foreplay, a foot massage for an hour may be the best thing to offer.
Begging has to be excluded from this perfect man’s vocabulary. Begging for sex? What’s that?
How about a man who neither contradicts us nor argues with us especially in front of our friends and family? We should be living in eternal bliss, not bickering – ever!
They say the way to a man’s heat is through his stomach, so let’s make sure this guy has enough money to take us to the finest restaurants so we can both indulge. Preferably this guy doesn’t like home cooked meals so there is little need for us to cook at all. If we do, by some odd occurrence, need to make a meal on occasion, it would be nice if this guy loves to do the dishes and clean up while we catch up on our Tivo.
As you can imagine, sex is rather important and very close in value to foot massages and watching the Miss America Pageant. So let’s have a guy who can remember all of the pageant contestants and what they wore for the evening gown event to help us when we try to pick the winner. And, by the way, a foot massage lasts at least twenty minutes, not thirty seconds.
Speaking of sex, our guy should want to have sex with us at beck and call and leave us the hell alone when we are “not in the mood.” We need to convey to you guys that post-play is more important than foreplay. Post-play is cuddling after sex. Cuddling can also be considered in-lieu of sex. That’s important to know!
Intellect, breeding and knowledge should be most evident when we take you out socially. This means you speak when spoken to.
This guy should look great in clothing and fine jewelry that he buys for himself after we have enough of our own. He should look even better in swimwear. No pot-belly for this guy. A six pack means great abs, not what he drinks while watching games all day long .
And this brings us to independently wealthy. He should preferably be a tycoon of some renown, busy enough to leave us to ourselves most of the time, but with enough leisure time to take us on exotic vacations and keep us company while shopping.
While this ideal guy might sound pretty, pretty good, one might ask, “if there are any men out there matching this description, what the hell would they want with you, you whiney bitch?”
Next we will explore the perfect female Internet date to get even with all of you who think this posting about the perfect male Internet date is so funny!
For more information on Internet dating go to my blog: http://www.whoyoudatingnow.com